Wedding Planning–Real Talk

This past weekend I received a call from a mother of a bride looking for information so they could plan their budget for the event.  Now, as a Mom myself, I greatly appreciate a Mom who does reconaissance work for their daughter.  I think it is great when Moms are involved in the planning process because they bring a great perspective to the planning process.  However, during this particular conversation, it was becoming clear that while the effort was very well intentioned, they were missing some clear understandings of what they were working toward.  A common saying is, “You don’t know what you don’t know.”

Wedding Planning Can Be Challenging

Wedding Planning can be stressful  because there are so many moving pieces and parts to a successful event.  It can be daunting when you think of how many different vendors you need to interview and qualify.  That is why you need to have a very clear idea about what type of event you want to host and how your budget fits into it.

So let’s discuss what you should be clear about before making those initial phone calls.

Each couple is unique and has a personal vision of their perfect Wedding Day.  Before any calls to vendors happen, you should determine the size of the guest list and what level of formality you want.  A casual picnic at a Park Pavilion for 35 people will be very different than a formal sit down dinner for 150 guests.  Both events will be beautiful, but the budget and the type of vendors you hire will be vastly different.

About Wedding Planning Budgets

Every couple has a Budget–some budgets are just larger than others.

Most people do not have any idea what a Wedding really costs.  And forget about those Wedding Planning articles on The Knot or Wedding Wire–often they are unrealistic or are using an “average” that has nothing to do with the area of the country where you are actually holding your event.

Before you do literally ANYTHING–sit down as a couple (or a family if parents are paying) and have an open, honest discussion about what you can afford and feel comfortable with.  Determining this number prior to any phone calls/appointments or bookings will save you lots of stress.  After all, there is nothing more disappointing than finding a vendor you love and then realizing you cannot afford to hire them.

Wedding Planning Priorities

Next–talk about what is important to you.  Maybe the flowers are super important to you.  Perhaps you always dreamed of a Destination Wedding.  As in any joint decision, compromise will most likely be necessary.

The largest line item in planning any Wedding is always the Venue/Catering/Guest List.  Many times the cost for venue and catering is 40-50% of the overall budget.  This then has a ripple effect on the amount of money left for other vendors. My number one piece of advice to anyone planning a wedding is to be realistic about how much the venue and catering will actually be costing you.  Add in that many popular venues have minimum numbers, and the venue cost can add up very quickly.

All too often I encounter couples who have spent most of their money on the venue with next to nothing left for florals, photography or entertainment.  As a Wedding Vendor of many years, I think we all work hard together to make couples’ dreams come true.  We are all equally important.

Hire Professionals

It can be tempting to have a friend do your flowers or an uncle photograph your wedding. But please don’t do that–hire professionals.  We have all heard of Weddings gone awry when a couple uses amateurs for things.

I understand that sometimes the numbers can be intimidating.  But I also know that many of my Wedding Vendor friends will try to work within your budget if you communicate that budget in a respectful manner.  That being said though–you may also need to recalibrate your expectations about what your budget will allow.

Final Thoughts On Wedding Planning

Once you know how large of an event you want to have, what type of venue you desire, and what your priorities are–then you are ready to start making inquiries.  Choose a date and venue first.  After that, my best advice is to seriously look at three to four vendors for each category.  It is best if you can do that in person if at all possible.  Take time to get to know potential vendors and ask lots of questions.  Make sure you are very clear about what is included in your contracts.  While this all takes time and effort, it is time and effort well spent.

If you enjoyed this post on Wedding Planning, you might also enjoy this post on Why Intimate Weddings Are Truly Wonderful.

Be sure to also check out our Wedding Photography Portfolio.

Ready to talk about Photography for your Event?  Use our Contact Form or call the Studio directly at (518) 584-4237 today.